Are you suffering from
Parallel Parenting. First observed in the sandpit. Psychologists noticed that very young children played independently.
arallel Parenting was first observed in the sandpit. Psychologists noticed that without the skills to socially interact, young children played independently, side-by-side in harmony. As neither child hit or bit the other, psychologists decided that this model of behaviour should be adapted to parents in the aftermath of a nasty divorce - the idea being that parents can co-exist without conflict, providing strict rules are observed. Of course, other psychologists then came along and said that parenting is not like playing in a sandpit, and kids behave better than adults, anyway.
Parallel Parenting is not unlike job-sharing, where two individuals, who would never have played side-by-side in the sandpit, are asked to co-manage and co-share in any future successes. In most cases, it leads to what psychologists now call the 'conflicted model', where one member of the job-share promptly fails to do his/her share of the work, but till takes all the credit.
Job-sharers don't exactly hit each other over the head with a shovel, but it's pretty close.